Ever wonder what happened to the NBA superstars who competed for a world championship all the way back in 2014? Well, we’ve got your answer. Here’s what some of those players who made names for themselves in 2014’s NBA Finals are up to today.
#21 – Center
He currently resides at the Pineview Grand Nursing Home, where he spends his time watching daytime television, forgetting his grandchildren’s names, and collecting unknown white stuff in the corners of his mouth.
#15 – Forward/Center
While many are confused how Matt Bonner got into the NBA in the first place, Matt has become everyone’s favorite substitute teacher at Grove Oak High School. As kids come into class, Matt pops on a movie (most of the time Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Slayer) and checks his Facebook for the entire hour. He never takes roll and let’s the students chew gum during class because he “thinks that’s a dumb rule to begin with.” He spends most of the day discussing the dynamics of the Wilco’s fourth album, Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, with the really “artsy” students. Matt also always competes in the annual Teachers vs. Students basketball game where he averages 33 points, 14 rebounds, 8 blocks, and 3 concussed students per game.
#20 – Guard
Manu has retired from professional basketball to work as a clerk at a convenience store in Manhattan. Which convenient store you ask? Literally any of them. Even though Manu is from Argentina, he also does some contract work with the Russian mob, living out the life of basically any bad guy in a Jason Statham movie.
#9 – Guard
Il est sans doute la natation , le vélo avec un panier à l’avant , ou faire quelque chose d’autre peuple français le font . Classique Frenchie .
You’ll never believe this, but Gregg is actually still the head coach of the San Antonio Spurs. He’s also continues to develop frustrations towards everything and everyone around him.
#30 – Guard
Norris actually quit basketball altogether to begin a career in acting. After many failed auditions and reads, he was finally fortunate enough to land the role of Vince LaSalle in the hit TV series Recess.
Chris “Birdman” Andersen
#11 – Forward/Center
Chris is hanging out by the front counter of a tattoo parlor, probably.
#3 – Guard
Unsurprisingly, Dwyane Wade failed to lead the Miami Heat to the playoffs this year without the help of LeBron James and a healthy Chris Bosh, leading Miami Heat fans (both of them) to wonder if Wade is as good as they thought, especially considering the only other ring he has without James/Bosh by his side was with Shaquille O’Neal by his side. And to stir controversy even more, citizens of Miami have started a petition to get Dwyane to change his name to the correct spelling of Dwayne.
#20 – Center
No matter when you’re reading this, he’s currently having knee and/or hip replacement surgery.
#0 – Guard
I honestly had no idea this was a person. I have no idea where he is now. Skip this one.
#1 – Forward/Center
Sadly Chris Bosh and everyone in his family are now extinct. Fortunately, however, you can still see his fossilized bones at the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History.
#15 – Guard
Mario passed away six months ago. R.I.P. Mario.
With the free time he has during the NBA postseason, Erik finally finished up the 9th grade and is currently studying to take his driver’s test in the fall, when he turns 16. Odds are he is currently hanging around kids his own age at the community skate park. Erik doesn’t really ever skate, but he goes to hang out, hold a skateboard under his arm, and show off his latest BIG DOGS t-shirt that he got on vacation with his family.
The Larry O’Brien Trophy
It is being displayed in a trophy case somewhere and fortunately is no longer accompanying Mark Cuban at urinals anymore.
#22 – Guard/Forward
James Jones now plays for the Cleveland Cavaliers and has been highly touted for not only leading the Cavs to their first NBA Finals appearance since 2007, but for also appearing in 5 straight NBA Finals, a feat that hasn’t been achieved since 1966.* Many NBA fans and analysts are demanding for the league to allow current players to be inducted into the Hall of Fame, just so they don’t have to wait for Jones to retire to vote him in.
*-Also, LeBron James accomplished that feat this year too. But who cares, amirite?!
#6 – Forward
He’s actually playing for the Cleveland Cavaliers and will more than likely see some playing time in the 2015 NBA Finals.