QUIZ: College Football Recruit or Made-Up Name?

QUIZ: College Football Recruit or Made-Up Name?


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It’s National Signing Day. The one day of the year where grown men try to pick up 17-year-old high schoolers and fall just short of becoming red dots on Google Maps. With that comes a circus of young, talented athletes with ridiculous names. So here we are with our third annual Korked Bats Quiz: College Football Recruit of Made Up Name?

We’ll give you the name. You decide whether it’s a real college football recruit or a made up name.The answers are revealed at the bottom.

1. Blanket Augustus

2. Terry Meatloof

3. Zach Sandwisch

4. DiCaprio Bootle

5. Plastic Vicarious

6. Handsome Tanielu

7. Dakota Holtzclaw

8. Dakota Q’Russell

9. Dakota Cru Birdyshaw

10. Thanksgiving Patrick

11. Raider Tu Bohedrick

12. Bo Peek

13. Brodarius Hamm

14. Eddie McDoom

15. Coke Tribecca

16. Rowdy Frederick

17. Brady Breeze

18. Gentle Williams

19. Optimus Primer

20. Octavious Cooley

21. Bread Uptavio-Savory

22. Sweet-Corn Cakes

23. Dock Luckie

24. Rough Slice

25. Mark McGwire

26. Super Lazers

27. Teufagafaga Luafatasaga

28. Bambi Davis

29. Hamp Cheevers

30. Michael Jackson


1. Blanket Augustus – MADE-UP – Who cares if his name is Blanket? Michael Jackson named his kid Blanket, and that guy was FULL of sound decisions.

2. Terry Meatloof – MADE-UPHe’s not real and doesn’t even sound good enough to be recruited.

3. Zach Sandwisch – REAL – West Virginia commit

4. DiCaprio Bootle – REALNebraska commit

5. Plastic Vicarious – MADE-UP Quick rule of thumb, if it’s plastic, it’s fake.

6. Handsome Tanielu – REAL BYU commit

7. Dakota Holtzclaw – REALKentucky commit

8. Dakota Q’Russell – MADE-UPThe Q’Russell family named their son after their favorite child actress from the 2003 coming of age drama ‘Uptown Girls’

9. Dakota Cru Birdyshaw – REALSouthern Miss commit

10. Thanksgiving Patrick – MADE-UP – How can anyone believe a name like that? I mean, who’s last name is Patrick?!

11. Raider Tu Bohedrick – MADE-UP –  Yeah, nothing about this name looks real.

12. Bo Peek – REAL Stanford commit

13. Brodarius Hamm – REAL – Auburn commit

14. Eddie McDoom – REALMichigan commit

15. Coke Tribecca – MADE-UPFake, but still better than New Coke.

16. Rowdy Frederick – REALTulsa commit

17. Brady Breeze – REAL Oregon commit

18. Gentle Williams – REAL Cal commit

19. Optimus Primer –MADE-UP – He’s the illegitimate son of a Transformer and a type of paint

20. Octavious Cooley – REAL – Ole Miss commit

21. Bread Uptavio-Savory – MADE-UP – Sounds like a meal you’d order at Cheesecake Facotry

22. Sweet-Corn Cakes – MADE-UP – This actually IS a meal you can order at Cheesecake Factory.

23. Dock Luckie – REAL LSU Commit

24. Rough Slice – MADE-UP – He’s fake, but with a name like that, I’d never say it to his face.

25. Mark McGwire – MADE-UPHe’s the former single-season home run champ*** and now the hitting coach for the San Diego Padres.

26. Super Lazers – MADE-UP – No, not real. But he seems like a cool guy, no?

27. Teufagafaga LuafatasagaMADE-UP – Is he a real person? Nopefagatasaga.

28. Bambi Davis – MADE-UP – It was sad when his mom died.

29. Hamp Cheevers – REALBoston College commit

30. Michael Jackson – REAL – Georgia Southern commit

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