So believe me, it was weird enough seeing AB win a Super Bowl with Tom Brady, but honestly, it’s even weirder seeing AB hang out with Kanye West. But again, it’s been that kind of year life for AB. He’s gone from straight up stripping off his uniform and leaving mid-game to hanging with one of the bigger celebrities who everyone seems to care about what he’s doing and how he’s doing it of our generation. AB has been posting various pictures of him and Kanye together at various events, so clearly the pair have been spending some time together, but AB has revealed that they will apparently be spending even more time together, this time at the Super Bowl.

Just a few weeks ago AB was catching passes from Tom Brady. Now he’s the owner… of 18 Super Bowl suite tickets. AB also appears have found a new job, not bad for a guy who just walked out on his old one.

According to his IG post, AB is now the President of Donda Sports and Kanye’s first task for AB was to grab tickets for The Big Game. Guess you could call it a corporate retreat? Just a casual $2.1 mill. And with a simple Google search, I discovered a shocking revelation.

AB just dropped roughly 67% of his entire salary for the 2021 season on a Super Bowl that he’s not even playing in. (Reminder: AB was just in the Super Bowl a mere 365 days ago.) But as the man told us himself with his debut song, he’s got a whole lotta money. So I guess it doesn’t matter.

Just to recap: AB will be in the Super Bowl, and Tom Brady will not. Did he get the last laugh? People are asking.

Also, memo to Donda Sports: if you need a blogger, HMU. I’m a fun hang, and like AB, I too enjoy partaking big football games in person.

The post Antonio Brown Spends 67% Of Entire 2021 Salary On Super Bowl Tickets That He’s Not Playing In appeared first on Korked Bats.

This tweet sent shockwaves throughout the entire league. Fast forward a few days, the report turned out to be true.

Tom Brady officially* retired. (for now… I mean, we all remember Brett)

Almost immediately, there was an outcry of love, support, and respect for Tom Brady throughout the league, praising him for a tremendous career, and rightfully so. You don’t need me to tell you that he’s won 7 Super Bowls and is 44-years-old.

One person that didn’t say anything, which is sort of his M.O. to begin with, was Bill Belichick. Bill has been relatively silent on the Tom Brady news and really has kept his name out of the news until….. the day Tom Brady officially retired.

Obviously, I am not making light of the severity of the situation, I respect Brian Flores for taking a stand and shining a light on a very serious issue in the NFL. I’m simply pointing out that I don’t find it to be no coincidence text messages by Bill Belichick surface the day Tom announced his retirement. Bill couldn’t handle the praise and love that Tom was receiving. To say he’s jealous would be an understatement.

First of all, the thought of Bill Belichick just texting, in general, has me giggling. He definitely texts with one finger and takes him a significant amount of time to send just the simplest text message. I mean, let’s be real, I can’t be the only one surprised that he has iPhone. Bill is definitely the type of person who couldn’t believe how expensive an iPhone was and will use his iPhone 4 until the iPhone 24 comes out.

Second of all, look at the team that Bill is throwing under the bus. Right? It’s the Giants. The only team to beat Bill and the Patriots twice in the Super Bowl. I’m not a conspiracy theorist, I’m simply stating the facts.

Bill straight up stole Tom Brady’s thunder by an “oops wrong chat” and threw multiple organizations under the bus in the process. You think I believe Bill Belichick “oops wrong chat”‘ted someone? Bill knew exactly what he was doing. He’s out here playing Belichess, not Belicheckers.

The post CONSPIRACY: Bill Belichick’s Texts Stole The Spotlight From Brady While Simultaneously Hurting The Giants appeared first on Korked Bats.

Look as I said in my previous post, it has been an emotional week for Pittsburgh. The news of Big Ben retiring sent shockwaves throughout the city. Quite literally.

A damn bridge collapsed to honor Big Ben’s retirement. Thank the lord no one was killed or fatally wounded because what a terrifying sight. A worst nightmare scenario for me. I have driven over and walked underneath that bridge hundreds of times. The worst part about all of this? Someone tried to warn the city back in December 2018.

Did this guy have any idea that his tweet be extremely relevant in 2022? No. But he also probably didn’t think that Big Ben would retire in 2022. It’s going to be hard to explain this one for city officials. Somebody is losing a job and it’s not just Ben as the Steelers quarterback.

If you need further evidence that we live in a simulation here’s your proof:

President Biden was scheduled to come to Pittsburgh to give a speech on infrastructure today. I do NOT believe in coincidences. First Big Ben retires, now this. Cool simulation guys.

Imagine being this lucky:

The real heroes from today are the first responders, ensuring everyone’s safety and made sure that everyone got out alive that was effected. This Port Authority bus driver is a legend:

It’s been a tough week for Pittsburghers. Let’s just hope nothing else bad happens and hopefully the Bengals lose on Sunday.

The post Big Ben Retires & Then Bridges Start Collapsing In Pittsburgh appeared first on Korked Bats.

Stop it. I’m not crying, YOU are crying.

Ok, I’m crying.

Big Ben’s Last Dance is officially coming to an end. What a ride it’s been. From the ultimate of highs, raising his two Lombardi trophies, to some of the lowest lows – namely off the field, Ben has had a storied career – both good and bad.

Let me peel back the curtain here and reveal a few things. I grew up in the Harrisburg area (the capital of Pennsylvania for those not from here) where NFL loyalties are probably the most divided in the entire country. Harrisburg is situated virtually in the middle of 6 teams: 1.5 hours from Philadelphia, 1.5 hours from Baltimore, 2 hours from D.C., 3 hours from Pittsburgh, and 2.5 hours from North Jersey. So I would say a large part of your fandom is born in the Harrisburg area based on who your parents rooted for, unless you were the occasional loser who said they were a Patriots fan because they were good.

I would say the majority of people in my area were Eagles fans simply based on proximity, with the Steelers being a close second. For the first part of my life, I was heavily invested in the Donovan McNabb-led Eagles. I remember exactly where I was when I saw the Steelers win the Super Bowl in ’06, Ben’s 2nd season under center. I remember being angry because I didn’t want the Steelers to win. Why? I have no idea, other than the simple fact I was told to hate the Steelers as an Eagles fan.

Fast-forward 4 years, and I moved to Pittsburgh to start my freshman year at Pitt (Always Hailing, H2P). The Steelers had just won their 6th Super Bowl in 2009 before I had gotten there, and I can recall thinking how I was going to bring a taste of sunny Philadelphia to the mean streets of Pittsburgh.

And then I fell in love with the city, and with that, I fell in love with the incredible sports culture that exists in this city. You can legitimately feel the energy on game day, and I, as much as I didn’t want to admit it, slowly started to realize that I was becoming a Steelers fan.

The Steelers managed to make it to the Super Bowl my freshman year of college to face, who other, then Aaron Rodgers (ironic because I want the Steelers to get him now.) I was incredibly heartbroken that night and just wanted to experience the joy of winning the big game in a city I had quickly fell in love with.

Obviously, I didn’t get to experience that Super Bowl victory, as a city of Pittsburgh resident with Ben as the quarterback, but I did become heavily invested in the Steelers. As the years went on, I started to go to more and more games – I just loved the grittiness of the team. They always found a way to win, in large part because of Ben. The guy never had a losing season. I found myself listening to sports talk radio, screaming at the tv, ripping my hair out, laughing at Mike Tomlin pressers, and experiencing every range of emotion possible as a football fan with this team. Big Ben was that team. For 18 years, he led that team. Sure, he could’ve done a lot of things differently, I mean just ask Tom Brady:

But in reality, I can thank Ben (and my wife, shoutout Brit) for making me a Pittsburgh Steelers fan. I am proud to say that I was at Ben’s last game at Heinz Field and it was just as emotional as it looked on TV.

Thank you, 7.

Thank you for an incredible career and the incredible memories. 7 has made a life-long fan out of me. But hey don’t take my word for it, see what else everyone is saying:

See you in Canton, 7.

The post I Wasn’t A Steelers Fan Until I Moved To Pittsburgh, And I Can Thank Big Ben For That appeared first on Korked Bats.

The Steelers losing to the Chiefs isn’t the end of the world, but it’s the end of modern-day Steelers as we know it. Big Ben’s last ride. Was it everything we thought it would be? No, absolutely not, only someone as delusional as myself would bet on the Steelers to be the one hoisting the Lombardi trophy this February. So delusional that I could have gotten better odds if I waited for playoffs to start than I did before the season. You just wanted the same thing for him as maybe someone like Peyton Manning or John Elway had. Obviously, delusion is an understatement.

Clearly, I thought all of my tweets and texts in our Korked Bats group chat with a bunch of Chiefs fans complimenting the Chiefs, saying how good of a football team they were, that they should rest their starters, and give Jackson Mahomes a crack at wide receiver would’ve helped reverse-jinx the Steelers into winning. I was willing to try anything. And for a brief moment (emphasis on brief), I thought it had worked.

When T.J. Watt ran that fumble back to go up 7-0 in the 2nd quarter, it felt like we already won the Super Bowl. I felt invincible. I was texting every person in my phone book. I was already telling myself there’s no way we don’t win the Super Bowl if we can topple Patrick Mahomes and his brother Jackson. I was smiling from ear to ear. And then Patrick Mahomes scored 5 touchdowns in what felt like a blink of an eye. Something Mike Tomlin warned me NOT TO DO!

And thus inevitable darkness came over me.

This was it. The season was as good as gone. I thought being at Big Ben’s last game at Heinz Field was emotional, I wasn’t prepared to see him go out like this. The only chance we had was winning the 1st quarter. We just didn’t even remotely have a chance, there was a reason it was the biggest spread in Wild Card history.

That game caused me to make a few irrational purchases:

Why did I buy a 1990 Hershey Park Jazz Band t-shirt? Because Hershey Park makes me happy.

Another purchase I made caused me to have a realization. I need to put my Steelers gear away for the offseason. It’s always sad but at least I’ll be able to wear this the rest of the season:

Call me Rob Lowe, because I’m officially an NFL fan for the rest of the season. I just want everyone to have fun. I love football. There will be a video to follow once it arrives. (shout out to Shop Zeds in Pittsburgh, as always, for the dope vintage)

The post Here’s How I’m Coping With My Team Losing In The Playoffs appeared first on Korked Bats.

You know what the opposite of Nike is? Just don’t do it. Please. Just save your money. But don’t take my word for it, just ask Big Ben:

I couldn’t have said it better myself, Ben. Just go out there and have fun, that’s what we all want to see. Does this sound like a quarterback you want to put your hard-earned money on? Didn’t think so. In fact, you’d be better off taking a drive on your local parkway, freeway, expressway, highway, whatever you call it and just start chuckin’ paper out the window, because that money is as good as gone. Hell, you might as well put your mortgage payment on the Chiefs. What a great football team. They know how to play the game of football (despite Patrick Mahomes looking dumb in a helmet).

I’d like to be the first to congratulate The CineBoiz, Jackson Mahomes, and all of Chiefs Kingdom on moving on to the next round after winning (and covering) the biggest spread in Wild Card history. Congrats Boiz. I’m just hoping for a Chiefs/Titans matchup so the Korked Bats rivalry (or lack thereof) can live on throughout the playoffs.

The post Why You Should Bet On The Steelers To Beat The Chiefs This Weekend appeared first on Korked Bats.

The fact that I have been Papa Bless’ed might as well have given me superpowers. Superpowers that give me the ability to eat 40 pizzas in 30 days, if I so desired. The type of superpowers that give me the strength to go in public wearing a Superman tank top. I’m just not quite sure what I did to deserve such a blessing.

What the hell is Papa Bless? Who the hell is Papa Bless? I don’t know. And that’s what’s so terrifying. The more I think about Papa Bless, the more scared I get.

And it’s not just me. The entire damn KB team is in shambles. Austin couldn’t stop thinking about Papa Bless.

Hell, The Cineboiz didn’t drop a pod this week. Why? Probably because Papa Bless. Papa Bless is haunting our daily life. Please send help.

The post If You Thought Papa John’s Was Bad, Just Wait Until You Meet Papa Bless appeared first on Korked Bats.

Imagine sitting there enjoying your nachos and then all of a sudden you notice what appears to be dust that settled on your tortilla chips. Sure you thought the cheese was old, but you didn’t think it was THAT old. Or imagine getting a little extra breading on your chicken fingers. And here I thought Big Ben was the only dead guy at Heinz Field on Sunday.

What in the world is happening this year? Is mercury still in retrograde? If it is, what does that even mean?

“An incident occurred during the game at Heinz Field on Sunday where a fan was spreading ashes of a deceased family member in the stadium,” Steelers spokesman Burt Lauten told WTAE-TV. “Heinz Field management does not permit or condone such actions. While we respect those fans who may be interested in honoring a family member by spreading their family’s ashes inside the stadium, Heinz Field cannot accommodate those requests due to state and local regulations. We have responded to communications from our fans throughout the years that this type of action is not permissible.”

via WTAE.com

You know, I would hope Heinz Field management wouldn’t permit or condone the spreading of ashes at the stadium. Sort of makes sense.

BUT, call me crazy, did the ashes play a part in getting the win on Sunday? Before Sunday, the Steelers season was looking bleak. The national talking heads calling for Big Ben’s retirement, discussing whether Mike Tomlin was on the hot seat, and the collapse of almost everyone’s groin on the team. Now that a random fan and their deceased family member came to the game Sunday, they come out of Heinz Field with a victory? Just sayin’.

The post Did The Ashes Of A Deceased Steelers Fan Help Them Win On Sunday? appeared first on Korked Bats.

First of all, how did a baby hire a lawyer?

…..that baby is grown now? Boy, life comes at you fast.

Spencer Elden, who is allegedly no longer a baby, put on his big boy pants and filed a lawsuit against Nirvana for sexual exploitation. The album, “Nevermind” from 1991, is nothing short of iconic and arguably the best Nirvana album of all time. The album has sold more than 30 million copies worldwide.

Here’s where it gets complicated: Elden has “Nevermind” tattooed across his chest. Talk about irony. The guy basically wants to be known as the Nirvana baby but wants to turn around sue the band for something he had no control over. His parents did. They were paid a whopping $200, which would be $400 in today’s dollars. Not bad work for a baby. Imagine if your baby got a job and started paying bills. That’s what Elden’s parents experienced. Did they realize that their baby’s picture would be distributed 30 million+ times worldwide? Most likely, no.

Elden did an interview in 2016 for Time where he’s not bitter at all saying how “everyone involved in the album has tons and tons of money” and that he’s “living in his mom’s house driving a Honda Civic.”

Well, Elden you were the richest baby in 1991 and now you get great gas mileage. Life could be worse.

The post The Baby From Nirvana’s “Nevermind” Cover Is Suing The Band, Proving He Still Has A Tiny Peen appeared first on Korked Bats.

If you’re the NFL, why would you even suit up this year? The season’s over. Can’t believe we’re going to see Cam Newton finally hoist the Lombardi Trophy this year. No thanks to anything he does. All thanks to the jacked Emporer Palpatine he has as a coach.

Who doesn’t love a coach that gets down and dirty with their team? I’m talking about rolling up your sleeves (if you have any), flipping your hat backwards, slapping a couple 25 pound plates and yelling “LIGHT WEIGHT!!!” as you pump out squats like it’s your day job. I’m talking about Bill f’ing Belichick.

I’ve gotta be be honest, which is hard to say as a Steelers fan, I love Billy B. Bill is a straight shooter. He’s going to tell you EXACTLY how it is and if he can’t tell you, then dammit he’s going to SHOW you. The man is 69 (very nice) years old and going to show you the proper form by pumping out a solid (does quick math in head) 95 pounds on the squat rack.

You think Willy B. skips leg day? Think again.

Good luck rest of the NFL.

With Bill, the only easy day was yesterday (because that’s when he had Tom Brady on his team).

If you want to hear Austin and myself talk more about Bill Belichick AND a defense of Tim Tebow, the return of the No Fun League (taunting penalties), preseason fights, and Max Scherzer not liking butt stuff, tune in to this week’s episode of the Junk Drawer. Join us and comment along during the show every Monday @ 5pm EST on the Korked Bats’ YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook.

WATCH/LISTEN BELOW:

The post BREAKING: Bill Belichick Just Ended The NFL Season Before It Even Began With A Single Photo appeared first on Korked Bats.