One of my favorite Saturday Night Live sketches of all-time is “Devil Can’t Write No Love Song” starring Will Ferrell and guest star Garth Brooks. In the sketch, Garth’s character is a struggling musician who decides he would sell his soul to the devil to write a hit song. The devil then appears and agrees to the deal and presents Garth with songs he has written. The problem…these songs are absolutely terrible. The worst. When Garth points this out, the Devil gets ultra defensive and blames anything but himself for the awful sound. He blames the guitar for being out of tune, the humidity in the room, and sore fingers. Whatever he can blame it on, he tries. Now, I will be doing the same for going 3-4 last week with college football picks. My WiFi was wonky. My air conditioning wasn’t working correctly which affected my thinking. I was coming down with a cold all week and wasn’t myself. It wasn’t my fault! Regardless, Fred’s Slacks is a winner.

I’m ready to put last week behind and move on to a winner. This week, we have some games that I am loving to the point of them essentially being locks. I’m going back to being me. Last week, I picked way too many underdogs. That isn’t like me. I got too fancy. We have to just take a step back and go back to the basics. Halloween weekend is one of the best weekends of the year to be on campus, and these games are going to be scary good. Will we be Tricked? Or Treated to a slate of wins today? Let’s get to the Pick Six and Dog Of The Week.

Ohio State @ Penn State Line: OSU -15.5

This is the highest spread that I’m picking today, but feel comfortable because it’s Ohio State. They put up points. Penn State has a good team this year and will probably be the best defense Ohio State has played so far, but I don’t think it’ll be enough. I think Penn State can hang around here, and maybe this won’t be a 30 point win for the Buckeyes, but even 17 sounds safe and realistic here. I don’t see Ohio State being truly put to the test until Michigan week.

Pick: OSU -15.5 Ohio State 44 Penn State 27

TCU @ West Virginia Line: TCU -7.5

I don’t expect to see much defense in this game, but then again when was the last time we saw defense in the Big 12? Here, the spread seemed too favorable not to pick TCU. They’re undefeated and going against a 3-4 West Virginia team who has not looked good this year, outside of the Baylor win. I think it will be a high scoring game, and if there’s a game that’s going to burn me this week it shouldn’t be this one.

Pick: TCU -7.5 TCU 38 WVU 26

Illinois @ Nebraska Line: ILL -7.5

Thankfully, appearing on the Pick Six doesn’t mean I have to watch the game. It just means I’m confident in the spread. If I had to watch this one I’d probably be asleep by the 2nd quarter. Not my style of football here. Yet, Illinois has been one of the bigger surprises of the season…and somehow, so have Nebraska but for other reasons. Winter is coming and Frost is gone. I think Illinois can keep the success going and win this ugly ugly game by about 10. Just please don’t make me watch it.

Pick: ILL -7.5 Illinois 23 Nebraska 13

Wake Forest @ Louisville Line: WAKE -3

Wake by only 3? At first it has me excited then I have to scratch my head…does Vegas know something I don’t? Shouldn’t they be favored by more than that? They’re 6-1 and the 10th ranked team in the country. Louisville is 4-3 and unranked. However, the do lead the country in sacks with 25 entering this week. Getting to the quarterback will be key, but I still think Hartman is experienced and skilled enough to overcome it. Louisville may keep it close but all we need is a three-point win? Come on! Don’t overthink it.

Pick: WAKE -3 Wake Forest 34 Louisville 28

Ole Miss @ Texas A&M Line: MISS -2

Ole Miss finally let me down last week. It was bound to happen, but I rode the hot hand. No regrets. Now, I’m definitely betting on a bounce back week against a struggling Texas A&M. Ole Miss averaged about 38 points a game compared to the Aggies averaging about 22. Both teams give up about 20 a game. Ole Miss has the better QB, which I always love betting on. Sure, Aggies have home field advantage, but they’re a 3-4 team. I don’t know if the students are going to make a difference in this one.

Pick: MISS -2 Ole Miss 33 Texas A&M 24

Pitt @ North Carolina Line: UNC -3

This is another game where I feel like I’m being deceived. What is Vegas thinking? Why are they setting us up like this? Regardless, I’m taking the bait. Maye has thrown for 24 TD and only 3 interceptions this year. UNC is 6-1. They’re at home. What more does Vegas want to see? I like Pitt’s D more than a lot of teams, but they can’t hang with UNC here. Love the spread and would even pick an alternative bigger spread if possible to get better odds. Love the Tar Heels this week.

Pick: UNC -3 North Carolina 27 Pitt 23

Dog Of The Week: Oklahoma State ML against Kansas State. Spencer Sanders is looking to go 4-0 against the Wildcats. Oklahoma City has made me more money than any other team in college football the past two seasons. I’m riding the hot hand here. Kansas State is beat up and I think the Cowboys are poised to keep up the success. I’ve seen no reason to doubt them. They’ll come away with another win here.

The post Pick Six: NCAA Football Week 9 appeared first on Korked Bats.

Hello my friend we meet again,
It’s been a while, where should we begin?

How about here: Scott Stapp is having himself a week. Just after the anniversary of his iconic Thanksgiving game halftime show at Cowboys Stadium…

Stapp now joined Kyle Brandt’s incredible (and still fairly new) podcast 10 Questions. And he dropped a bomb about how Vanderbilt – of all places – is somehow responsible for him getting in to music.

STAPP: Well, I actually went to Vanderbilt University and was gonna play there. I didn’t attend. Sorry, that came out wrong. I went to Vanderbilt University, met the coach, they had offered me a scholarship to play at Vandy, went there with my dad. And when I was getting taken on a tour with a fellow ball player there, I went to a frat party. And I saw this guy singing, you know like a covers band or what not, and I looked up there and just saw the front row. And it was a lot of lovely Vanderbilt University ladies at the time. And I got the rockstar itch right there. And so, my life took a few turns – went to Lee [University], ended up at Florida State, and started a band. And that’s how it played out.

As a Nashville native, I get it. You can’t go anywhere in that town without a singer (famous or not) booked to play a gig. Restaurants, the airport, gas stations. You name it. You want live music at Costco? Some hopeful musician probably has a gig there right next to the travel kiosk where you can purchase half-priced cruise tickets. Every waiter in that town is an aspiring musician with a demo flash drive in their back pocket and a gig booked for tomorrow night at Office Max. So of course there’s going to be some dude at an SEC frat house pulling out a pic in his wallet, with his acoustic guitar on his knee, asking everyone if they wanna hear Wonderwall.

And it was essentially that guy at Vandy who’s to thank (or blame) for Stapp’s career. Is Vanderbilt responsible for Creed? Make that judgement for yourself. Nevertheless, Anchor Down, I guess?

Now obviously this recruiting trip was pre-Tim Corbin days. Way before Walker Buehler and Dansby Swanson. And way before Pedro Alvarez and David Price. Hell, this could’ve been the Scott Stapp era of Vandy baseball. *sigh* What could’ve been.

And look, you can say what you will about Creed or Stapp, but I’m here for this interview. The guy came across as super cool and super self-aware in the podcast. Plus, as you know, KB is a big KB house. We love Kyle Brandt here at Korked Bats. If you like sports, pop-culture, and TRIVIA – Kyle threw the three into a blender (with probably a little whey protein too) to create this awesome podcast. So go check out this podcast – exclusively on Spotify (or on The Ringer’s YouTube) channel. And make sure you stick around for the question where Kyle asks Stapp what his relationship with the Internet is like.

And lastly, can’t talk about Creed without dropping a quick power ranking of top Creed songs. Is this the most basic bitch list of all time? You betcha. Mainly because I was raised on Top 40 radio. So here we go…

5. My Sacrifice

4. With Arms Wide Open

3. Higher

2. It’s Been A While*

(* – I know this is technically a Staind song, but I’m still putting it in my Top Creed songs list.)

1. One Last Breath

Damn, if this doesn’t give you NOW: That’s What I Call Music nostalgia, I don’t want to know you.

Also, don’t @ me. This isn’t up for debate.

The post Scott Stapp Almost Played Baseball At Vanderbilt, But His Recruiting Visit Turned Him To Music appeared first on Korked Bats.

* – Not entirely sure this adjective is factual.

However, the Lobos probably lead their conference in Major League parody videos. The boys from Alpine, TX recreated this scene from the 1989 film:

And now, here’s the Sul Ross State version of that commercial:

• • •

This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post College Baseball Team Spoofs ‘Major League’ Commercial [VIDEO] appeared first on Korked Bats.

I’d like to describe this videos as “so ridiculous, it’s stupid,” but these guys play baseball for Harvard, so it’s more like it’s “so ridiculous, it was the valedictorian of your high school senior class, probably.”

Note: The description of this video on YouTube claims the guy in the back row really was asleep throughout the making of this video.

• • •

This post was created by Austin. You can follow him and his jokes on Twitter: @TheAHuff

Also, for up-to-the-minute sports jokes, follow Korked Bats on Twitter: @KorkedBats

The post Call Harvard Maybe appeared first on Korked Bats.

If you have been asleep for the last two weeks, then let me be the first to tell you. Garrett Wittels (sophomore infielder for FIU) has slowly but surely given himself a wonderful chance to break Robin Ventura’s college hit streak record. He is currently sitting at 54 straight games with a hit, just four shy of Ventura’s 1987 record of 58 (54 + 4). The FIU Panthers managed to shake off a first game loss in the Sun Belt conference to win the championship game on Sunday against Troy. This win not only extended Wittel’s streak, but also clinched a berth into the NCAA tournament. According to Tim Reynolds of the highly acclaimed Star-Telegram, Wittels had this to say about his streak after the big win, “I’m really not thinking about it. We’ve got to get ready for a regional, get in there, hopefully swing the bats and have everything keep going as planned.”

-I have underlined and italicized everything in the previous paragraph that may be discouraging to an FIU fan.

It has not yet been determined who FIU will play in the regionals on Monday, but I can tell you that only about 55 people will care about the outcome of the game, while the rest of America will only want to see if Wittels can continue this courageous display of mental toughness.

My Prediction: After listening to several interviews of the ever-so-humble Garrett Wittels, it sounds like he has all the intangibles to accomplish this extraordinary feat. I have analyzed data and swing diagrams and concluded that he has the ability to get a hit in 5 straight games (knock on wood/bat). At this point, the only person who can stop Garrett Wittels is Garrett Wittels…

…and Tonya Harding.

[poll id=”16″]

The post Wittel Red Robin Could… appeared first on Korked Bats.

What is this? A Holiday Inn Express?!

The post Sammy Sosa Turning White and NCAA Predictions appeared first on Korked Bats.

This series was a compelling series to watch, but not for the outstanding baseball. In fact, I don’t know what it was, but something kept me attracted to watching the entire College World Series.

I’m a huge baseball fan but not particularly a huge college baseball fan. I guess it was something about ESPN’s camera work that had me glued to my TV.

Watching the College World Series sure was a sight for sore eyes.

Yeah, like I said, I don’t know what it was, but this years College World Series had me glued to the TV. Good work with the coverage, ESPN.

Who says baseball isn’t a beautiful game?!

The post C.W.S. appeared first on Korked Bats.